{pleading}

Four deaths in a month, another house flood last night, 2 TB and 2 years of personal photos (of my sweet babies) and professional photo shoots lost today, financial strain..and...and....and.... Dear God, I have always been positive and grateful and fought to be strong enough to carry my load...no matter how heavy that load was...AND still carry others...as was my honor and blessing to do so. You have given me such a strong spirit...and for that, I am so eternally grateful. But I am not feeling very strong today. I know You are there. You always have been...and always will be. And I know that You have brought my sweet Jeff into my life, my strong and amazing pillar, to hold me now in these brief moments in my life when I have needed someone to be strong FOR me for the first time - in the midst of these particularly strong storms that I know are necessary to refine me. What a miracle You have sent to me...for so many reasons. For the rest of my life, I will thank YOU daily for him. I have never had that strength next to me...and as I am learning that it's okay NOT to be strong ALL the time...what a miracle to have someone so strong beside me...someone I KNOW is always there.  Perhaps that is what You mean for me to learn....to lean on others when I cannot stand on my own. I am learning to allow others to serve me...as challenging as it is for me. I am trying so very hard and trying to stay positive and only allow my faith in You to grow and never falter. I am so grateful for my challenges that are molding me into the woman that You have destined me to be. But just today God...please...please calm my storm or calm my heart.....strengthen my back and my soul....or please God, carry me....because I am not strong enough to carry all of this right now.

"You must
You must think I'm strong
To give me what I'm going through
Well, forgive me
Forgive me if I'm wrong
But this looks like more than I can do
On my own

I know I'm not strong enough to be
Everything that I'm supposed to be
I give up
I'm not strong enough
Hands of mercy won't you cover me
Lord right now I'm asking you to be
Strong enough, strong enough
For both of us

Well maybe
Maybe that's the point
To reach the point of giving up
Cause when I'm finally
Finally at rock bottom
That's when I start looking up
And reaching out

I know I'm not strong enough to be
Everything that I'm supposed to be
I give up
I'm not strong enough
Hands of mercy won't you cover me
Lord right now I'm asking you to be
Strong enough, strong enough

Cause I'm broken down to nothing
But I'm still holding on to one thing
You are God and you are strong when
I am weak

I can do all things through Christ who
Gives me strength
And i don't have to be strong enough (2x)

I know I'm not strong enough to be
Everything that I'm supposed to be
I give up
I'm not strong enough
Hands of mercy won't you cover me
Lord right now I'm asking you to be
Strong enough, strong enough"

Comments

[Vi]

I am so, so sorry. You are looking in the right direction for strength, though. This is one of my favorite verses.

"Fear thou not, for I am with thee; be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness" Isaiah 41:10

[Sandy Mohon]

Praying for you and your family.